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23/08/2021

The Earth will be flat, it's written.

 I ain't a poet but my heart's broken it starts to fall apart to sing my feelings will only leave me drowning, i'd do everything to change everything, no punches to swing, believe me i'm only left with this thing.

I laugh, jokes around, smiles even when i'm in adversity,
I scream without a sound, every single time they starts calling me crazy,
Friends call me Syai, but I'm just a clown. Repeatedly fell down, it kills the Shy-ness in me,
The Syairazi people used to know is no where to be found, but hey, this is me it's syairazi.
I'm the joke of the town,
But open up the dictionary, read all of the nouns,
Done them all but i'm still down underground,
From the Quran the worlds' gonna be flat, and not round.
I set my life based on that now, so I gave away my sinner crown.
Kynn, you're my queen. please accept me, I'm doing this for us and our son.


ADVANTAGE from THE DAMAGE is the new VINTAGE

 4A-GE 7A-GE are two of my favorite engines in the world..

Quite irrelevant here, but here's the equation.

Toy Soldier goes Step by Step, and Heart to Heart. Left right left? We all fall down.

STEP BY STEP

1 + 1 = 2

2+1 = 3

Numbers don't lie?

Same as the "Katas" from Karate Steps, or Silat or whatever martial arts. If you forget one, it'll be "Sumbang".

You gotta have to remember the first step and be consistent with it.

Heart to Heart

You gotta learn by heart to learn further or you'll find that sadness of not knowing or understanding what the shiznit you're doing.. You'll be in a loop of being the wonder woman who keeps wondering all the time but not even moving forward. You gotta have to move and move and move if you wanna. It's okay to share the war stories cause it's always good to learn from histories. Yet, narrow minded humans will say "Ahh, don't dwell in the past" everytime you share those stories.

You know why they wanna say that? They didn't listen by heart. Same goes to those who listen to Justin Beiber's song titled "Lonely". Most dudes would go "That's gay".. I say "I feel your pain bro"

At this moment right here, I really miss talking to my friends like Jaymie Foo, Farred, Bahrul, and Amzari. Wherever you are guys, at this time of my downfall. I'm writing a blog from my sister, Syazana Sunarto's laptop which I recommended her to buy for $100. Cause in this time of the year, I am facing a downfall even though I've earned $1,300 commissions on a one gig of selling a car from Skoda. Went out from that job to be back in my hometown, KB. Now i'm workin as a round role crew in KFC, Seria.

No phones yet, or access to my social media cause I changed my passwords which I saved the new login info in the phone that I have lost 3 months ago. But this burning desire in my heart still wanna learn how to fix my marriage from these friends of mine even when Amzari and Jaymie aren't married yet. But yea, you know you're a learner when you still wanna listen to people who are making sense and says the sensible things from their heart and not something that sounded like what they just picked up a scripted line from a movie they watched.

I know these people learned a lot because they have been through it all in any ships. They're the real sailors. Nakhoda. I sunk my ship, now just floating along with a lifebuoy.

LEFT RIGHT LEFT?

I thank all the officers from authorities to have covered my ass in so many ways. But here's the point. Who's right all along, they never left. Those who didn't pass their heart's empathy or not even listening well (not from their heart, cause I recently met a deaf dude which is a lil bro of my friend. he knows how sad I am and helped me a lot whenever his brother can't make it for me. I don't know how to talk to him, or how to communicate but we both did all quietly but he cried when I dropped off my son's need infront of my in law's house). Hence, those who have self-proclaims that they seemed to know life the fullest, they still left, even when I'm right.

I have many friends from different age groups. My millenial friends calls me Mafia, the 90's generation which is my age-group they call me the Psycho, where the older people who's now in their 40's, 50's & 60's half of them called me "Kerita Kabal" which is a Tank in english. Another half calls me the Robin Hood, even Uncle Adnan says that. I'm the Robin Hood who did the nasty stuff for his people. Still figuring out what they meant by those. But from the millenials they learned a lot from me, I even learned more from them. A direct changes of knowledge about their generations. This way, I could find the missing dots to connect once my son grows up one day.

WE ALL FALL DOWN


So, the bottomline is for you to think. Wherever you are, whatever you are right now. I for sure tell you, we all fall down. So, if you know me. I'm just doing what I'm doing. Even when you are hurt by me, I tell my self it's Allah's doing and it is always beyond my control, even when I tried to fix it. I always stop trying whenever I felt "Atleast I tried" kind of feeling. In the end, why I still smile and laugh? Cause I'm still doing deeds and good for people in my everyday life. I greet people well, I support my friends and helps even when I know I'm at my lowest. So, the why is because I know we all fall down towards our last breath. So here's to my wife, I hope you change your mind. #roadtojannah

I'm heading there, I want you to join me my wife. I'm no longer chasing the entrepreneur life.



Marriage

 So, I got married in 2014, divorced my first marriage in the year 2016, got married again with the love of my life Rakinah Bte Abd Rahman years after.

My wife and I had son named Syukran Bin Syairazi. We're having another son on the way.

I still love her, and I miss my son.

Syukran's Razikynn

I don't know how to say this, but my life is ALWAYS FOREVER ENDEAVORS 

gett it?

But yeah, I might or might not blog about how my life have gone along the years of being an entrepreneur.

Here's the thing I've learned from Mighty Car Mods dudes (Moog & Martin), don't give a damn about the comments of those who complains and never knowings cause they're all annoying, PLUS they will never learn anything..

Why do I say that? Cause believe me I am continuously learning, atleast I know my self that I am cause I have been from a Sinner to a person who believes in Allah. I have been learning a lot that I can't believe I am who I am right now. You know what else? I've had my best adventures being on top as an entrepreneur, a business partner, venture capitals to SMEs and the lowest I've been was fishmonger's peasant in 2020.

Just check out my youtube account for more of my life transitions since my last post of 2016:-

 www.youtube.com/syairazisunarto